I was really looking forward to watching Wanderlust, the new movie about a harried NYC couple (played by Paul Rudd and Jennifer Aniston) who end up living in a hippie commune called Elysium. It was inevitable I would see this movie, having traveled to around 40 “communes” in the early 90s studying children and education for my graduate thesis, living in about a dozen (including Findhorn and Auroville) and now directing Living Routes, which runs college programs in “ecovillages” around the world. My wife and co-adventurer, Monique, and I just returned from the theater where we both laughed harder and longer than with any movie in recent memory. Granted, Wanderlust is a comedic spoof of communal life with over-the-top stereotypes and clichés, but the crew did their homework (at a 30-year-old commune in the North Georgia Mountains called Earthsong) and much – although not all – of Elysium rang surprisingly true.
What they got right:
- Communities are going strong. In the production notes, Alan Alda (who plays Carvin, the community’s founder) said he was surprised when he “looked up communes and found out that they actually still exist, except now they call them ‘intentional communities…. I thought these places were just a thing of the ’60s and ’70s, but apparently they are still common.” Damn straight! The Fellowship for Intentional Community (FIC) lists close to 2,000 communities in the U.S. alone and the Global Ecovillage Network lists over 500 self-identified “ecovillages” around the world. These are communities creating models for how to live well and lightly in a post-oil world.
- There are no utopias. Perhaps because of their emphasis on caring and support, communities often attract “characters”. Our personal baggage doesn’t magically disappear in community. There’s an old Japanese saying that says a good way to wash potatoes is to put them in a large pot of water and shake. Simply by rubbing against each other, they clean each other. It is inspiring to witness people get a little rounder and less edgy through rubbing against others in community.
- They are experimental. From permaculture to polyamory, communities often think outside the box. While many communities are open to various models of non-monogamy, most do so with more wisdom than is displayed at Elysium. The movie was spot on, however, in that some couples join community at least partially because the guy is attracted to a polyamorous lifestyle, but it is often the gal who ends up wanting to stay.
- Living in community transforms lives. Jennifer Aniston said, “We shot for three months, but I wanted this to go on for 10 years. We had an incredible amount of fun, and it just kept getting better.” I’m sure much of this had to do with the wonderful cast, but I suspect some was also due to “playing in community” together. Humans evolved as social animals and intentional communities offer opportunities to reawaken to our “tribal roots”. This experience is often an epiphany for those of us who grew up without a deep sense of belonging or community.
Undisturbed home births are possible. Okay, I have to add this. Monique is a midwife and was thrilled to see a portrayal of birth other than a woman screaming in a hospital. In fact, our youngest daughter, Pema, was born at home, underwater, and unassisted and it was a wonderfully peaceful experience that you can see a bit of here. Monique tells me it is also healthier to not cut a baby’s umbilical cord at least until the the cord has stopped pulsing and delivering oxygenated blood. A few women (like the character Almond in the movie) do wait until the cord naturally dries up and falls off (this is called a Lotus Birth), but this is done for spiritual rather than medical reasons.
What they got wrong
- Community members do work. In the movie, folks spent most of their time playing music and smoking pot. While community members do have a lot of fun and often enjoy more leisure time than in mainstream society, it is also a lot of work to keep things running and drug use is not nearly as prevalent as one might think.
- Communities have moved way beyond encounter groups. It was frankly embarrassing and a bit sad to watch the “Truth Circle” at Elysium where members were encouraged to vent and rage with little facilitation or support. This is an area where communities have evolved beyond both the 60s and mainstream culture. Many are doing cutting edge work with regards to transpersonal psychology, health and well-being, and inclusive forms of governance.
- Communities do have doors. Okay, truth be told, I did visit a community in Missouri once that had a two-seater outhouse where you never knew when someone might come in and sit next to you. But in every other community I’ve ever visited or lived in, members have ample access to privacy (and doors). I suspect this is even a stronger need in community than in mainstream society given the intensity of social interactions throughout the day.
- Communities are plugged in. There is a common misconception that communities have cut themselves off from the “real” world. While some isolationist communities may exist (and are, therefore, almost by definition hard to find), the vast majority are very connected to local and global issues. They’re not escaping the real world, but rather trying to find more authentic and sustainable ways to engage with it. Some communities such as Findhorn have become networking and informational hubs with over 30,000 people visiting each year.
- Communities have membership processes. In the 60s and 70s, some estimate up to 100,000 communities formed in the U.S., and most did so very casually (e.g. “Hey folks! My uncle has some land he said we could live on. Let’s go!”). Most of these communities burnt out quickly when difficulties arose and they had no way of creating group norms or processes to orient new members or ask anyone to leave. Serious communitarians often left to create 2nd and 3rd generation communities where they could learn from their mistakes. George and Linda were welcomed into Elysium on the spot, but nowadays, almost every community has formal membership (and exit) procedures and probation periods to protect and preserve what they have created. (Thanks Helen Sandy for reminding me of this 10th point!)
For more ways communities don’t conform to popular conceptions, I encourage you to read the FIC’s article on What’s True About Intentional Communities: Dispelling the Myths. I also encourage you to go and see Wanderlust and let me know what you think. Thanks for reading!
In community,
- Daniel
One recent example is the movie 
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), imagine a “football field of life” and the end zone is sustainability. I’d say humans are somewhere around the 10-yard line. The strategy I’ve brought to Living Routes has been to throw a Hail Mary to ecovillages, that are perhaps somewhere between the 60 and 80 yard lines. It’s an exciting play able to create huge advances, but it’s also risky, requires a lot of faith, and focuses on just a few players.
